Christmas in May
by NursingSchoolGrad
Summary: Mayor Tucker gets accused of bribery, illegal hiring practices, and believing in Santa Claus.


_Author's Note: a short story I wrote awhile back intended to be part of a longer work but still unfinished. Tucker is Mayor and it is a few months after Phantom Planet. I don't own DP. Posted Dec. 6, 2018._

* * *

"We go now to the county courthouse as Mayor Foley speaks to the people!" The television screen flickered to the steps of the courthouse where Tucker stood in front of a lectern. "As Mayor of Amity Park," Tucker announced from the steps of the courthouse. "I declare Christmas in May to be a week from now. We've all been through a lot with the disasteroid, and we need a break. Who says good things can't happen twice a year?"

" _No,"_ Danny sighed and jumped off the sofa, past Jazz to turn the television off.

"What's wrong, Danny?" Jazz asked, looking up from her academic journal of psychology.

"The first – no the second thing Tucker does as mayor is make my life more annoying. He knows none of my Christmases are ever enjoyable!" Danny complained.

"But… It's probably good for Amity Park's economy," Jazz offered, afterwards realizing that this was not the best thing to say when Danny slumped back on the sofa. According to her psychology textbooks, she was disregarding what Danny had said. She had to focus on understanding Danny, finding out why he was frustrated, by practicing "therapeutic communication."

Jazz tried again. "Danny, have you ever heard of mandalas?"

"Mandela? Like Nelson Mandela?"

"No, _mandalas._ Circular drawings consisting of repetitive lines." She opened her academic journal to a page of black lines on white paper, setting it on the coffee table. It looked sort of like a drawing from a coloring book. Danny looked at the article title: "Mandala use in palliative care."

"Palliative care?" he asked.

"It is physical and emotional care for those who are dying or have an incurable condition," Jazz explained. "The authors of this article consider coloring mandalas to have a calming effect."

"Oh," Danny said.

"Would you like to color one?" Jazz asked. "They say the way you color it tells a lot about what you are having to go through."

"Uh-huh," Danny said skeptically.

" _Danny._ "

"I'm – I'm not an experiment, Jazz!" He swiped his hand across the coffee table, wrinkling the mandala page. "And I don't feel being a ghost is a hopeless condition! And I'm not dying, even if mom does sigh and get that worried look every time she sees me as Phantom now."

 _Well,_ thought Jazz, _at least I know why he's been worrying._ However, before she could think of any good "therapeutic communications" thing to say, Danny flew the coop, zooming out the back wall.

Now that Danny had told everyone on the planet that he was a halfa, things had gotten very bizarre. Sure, Jazz had known ahead of time, but she'd also spent way too much time psychoanalyzing him. According to her, his decision to declare his half-ghost status publicly meant that he was abandoning the semblance of a normal teenage life and risked being some sort of outcast from society. Danny had reminded her that he'd already was a "loser" kid at school, even before the accident, and that if anything, he needed something to keep all the attention aimed at him now from going to his head.

* * *

Danny traipsed around the rooftop of the tallest building in Amity Park, using a pair of binoculars to look for ghosts. He wanted something to do: but the ghosts in the Ghost Zone were still celebrating that they'd "saved the world" and weren't too keen on terrorizing the public. In fact, Danny hadn't even found the Box Ghost all week (a new first); and this – along with school being out – really changed Danny's schedule. Sam was on vacation in Bangkok with her wealthy parents and Tucker had been texting him random things he'd heard at City Council meetings. Some of them, such as the sewage and wastewater proceedings, Danny felt he could never forget.

He sighed, he often came up here to think while staying on the lookout for ghosts. He could have hovered anywhere, of course, but it wasn't so simple. If he didn't remember where he was in relation to nearby objects he would drift. Once, Johnny 13 had told him that there were ghosts who'd lost all directional sense and drifted off the earth and into space. Danny wasn't sure he believed this but it did make sense: the earth was constantly moving through space so if you didn't remember to move along with it, it was theoretically possible to get left behind.

He sighed, shaking his head and peering through the binoculars. In the distance he saw Dash climbing a tree to put a nerd's stolen backpack on the tallest branch. Danny would go get it down later; Jazz had explained that Dash would probably be looking for a way to confront him now that he was famous, and he didn't want to talk to Dash now.

Leaping off the roof, he headed for City Hall, any minute now the Horticultural Historical Society had finished their spiel on Luxurious Latent GMO Lotuses and he could talk to Tucker.

* * *

"Well. What would make you happy?" Tucker asked.

"Why couldn't you – I don't know – have made a second Halloween instead?"

"Because… people don't spend as much money on Halloween which equals fewer tax dollars. Besides, no one wants to dress up in hot costumes in the middle of summer, except for goths."

"-And geeks that make their own armor."

"I am _not_ a techno-geek!"

"Yeah, and I'm not a halfa."

"AHA!" Tucker looked omniscient with a big grin on his face.

"What?" Danny warily asked.

"I know what you're trying to do! You're trying to bribe the Mayor!"

"This isn't bribery…"

"That's what they all say. I ought to toss you in jail." Tucker held his PDA triumphantly in the air.

"Tucker-"

"That's _Mayor_ Tucker Foley, the duly elected write in candidate."

"Alright, Mayor Tucker Foley, the duly elected write in candidate, I can't be accused of bribery because I haven't paid you anything! I don't have any money."

"What about your fans?"

"Well, a few people did give me a tips after I rescued them, but then people on the internet started telling everyone that ghosts don't need money."

"That's actually a good point." Tucker rubbed his chin. "I can't remember any of the ghosts around here becoming bank robbers."

"They're like, 'Ghosts don't have to pay cost of living expenses.' 'Ghosts don't have to buy food.' 'Ghosts have their own lairs.'" Danny waved his hands as his ticked off each criticism.

"Do you know what you need?" Tucker asked.

"No?"

"You need a job, and you've come to the right place." Tucker swung one of his arms in a fatherly gesture over Danny's shoulders while his other arm hugged his PDA.

"You have a job for me?"

"Of course. People expect their duly elected officials to give them jobs, or, at least encourage the business sector to hire more people." Tucker rushed over and pulled a poster-board out from a closet. "This, my friend, is a top-secret plan!" He pointed to a line that rose across the page. "It is our ideal plan of Amity Park job creation. It measures how many people get hired in Amity Park each week."

"Does it say how many people quit?" Danny asked.

"That's on another chart. But it's even more top-secret."

"Why?"

"Well, we wouldn't want to discourage young, poor, innocent souls from finding work. Also, we know that many teens quit their summer jobs when they go back to school, but the news media would not take that into account when critiquing our plan and they would broadcast that our job market was the worst in the nation."

" _Is_ it the worst in the nation?" Danny asked.

"No! Of course not, it's just that no town wants to report those statistics. So, if we were the only ones who did, we'd be worst in the nation."

"And also the best."

"You've got a point. You're hired, Danny, and you're going to love it."

* * *

Danny wondered how Tucker had talked him into this.

He was in a dark, smelly, cavernous sewer with only the light from his glowing eyes to see where he was going. He was also wearing a yellow hazard uniform and thought that peering out of this tiny plastic mask was quite annoying. Who knew what sorts of sewer monsters might sneak up behind him? Ghost sense didn't warn him of alligators or mutant giant pythons.

The one good thing, as Tucker pointed out, was that since Danny _was_ a halfa, he could stay intangible and not touch anything icky in the sewer.

All he had to do was find what clogged the pipes, ectoblast it, and be on his merry way.

It was, after all, a lot easier to do this than for a crew to spend all day digging up pipes and re-pouring concrete.

And he was getting paid.

Five hours and four showers later he went home and flopped into bed…maybe he'd have the stomach for breakfast in the morning.

* * *

The next day, he showed up at 8:45 am at City Hall, a little less ready for the sewer work than he had been yesterday.

"Hi there, Danny!" Tucker said, throwing an arm over his shoulder.

"Hey…" Danny mumbled.

"I have another job for you today," Tucker said, pulling him into an empty bathroom so they could talk privately. "You see, I realized that our normal plumbing crew is going to be a little bit upset if they find out you've replaced them, so I think I'm going to transfer you between departments."

"Okay," Danny said, wondering if this was a good thing or a bad thing.

"It's not that we didn't need you yesterday, we had a pretty big backflow of work that needed to be done if you catch my drift."

"Office politics?" Danny asked.

"I… well, anyway, you'll get paid. That's the main thing, right?" Tucker asked.

* * *

"You're the worst gardener I've ever seen!" sawoman who looked reminiscent of the Lunch Lady said exasperated. "We were supposed to finish this row an hour ago!"

"I'm sorry, I'm new," Danny said, truth be told, he'd only gardened at school before, his parents were much too obsessed with ghosts to even notice the need for anything except mowing the lawn.

"I thought working with a ghost was supposed to make my day go faster!"

"It does! I can get rid of weeds without having to use the spade!" Danny said, turning a dandelion intangible and pulling it out of the ground, roots and all.

"So does Round-up!" she huffed.

"How can you be part of a historical society if you use GMO plants?" Danny asked. "How are lotuses in any way historical to Amity Park?"

"They finally invent a lotus that doesn't require a pond to grow in and you're asking questions like that?"

"Is that rhetorical?" Danny said before he realized it would be better to be quiet.

"Oh, you think you're smart? Do you want to leave now or now minus five minutes?" she hissed, some of her hair was falling out from under the bandana she wore on her head.

"Uh…"

"If my dearly departed sister were here, she'd knock some sense into you. She was a lunch lady and always made sure boys ate their meat instead of giving her the lip."

"The lip?"

"TALKING BACK!"

Danny's hair was literally blown back by the force of her yell. He turned around and flew away.

"You don't skedaddle from me!" she hollered after him.

* * *

Back at the mayoral office Danny waited for Tucker to return. There was no secretary in the office. Vlad hadn't hired one because he wanted to keep his ghostly side a secret. Tucker probably needed one, though, Danny thought as he thought back to the circles he'd seen under Tucker's eyes. Because Tucker had darker skin, he must be exhausted if Danny could actually see circles under his eyes.

"Hey, Danny," Tucker said, walking into the room.

"I'm sorry, Tucker," Danny sighed. "Did you know the Gaffer Lady is the Lunch Lady's sister?"

Tucker didn't say anything for a couple seconds, then replied, "Wow, you're right."

"I don't know who she was comparing me to, but she said I don't work fast enough."

"Yeah…" Tucker sighed. "We'll find something else."

"Um, Tucker?" Danny looked around the room, seeing a blanket and pillow tucked into the corner behind the bookshelf. "Tucker, when was the last time you got to go home?"

Tucker stared blankly and started to count on his fingers, then he sighed and gave up. "Danny, there's just so much work. I'm never going to get to the end of it. There are all these meetings during the day, and I can't sign stuff that I haven't read, not in a good conscience, at least, so I've been reading those at night."

"Tucker, I think you need a secretary to read those papers. And you don't have to go to every meeting. Do you think Vlad went to every meeting?"

"Danny, he was a _bad_ mayor!"

"Yeah, so people are taking advantage of the fact that you're good, that you'll listen, but you're just going to wear yourself out and pretty soon you won't be able to help anyone."

"Heh, that's what Sam says to you when you come to school after fighting ghosts all night."

"Okay, fine," Danny said. "I'll help you and you don't have to pay me. Hand me those papers and I'll read over them while you get some rest."

"You're a great friend, Dan-" and Tucker slumped over in the leather chair, snoring.

* * *

At 6pm, Danny's phone rang.

"Hey, Sam!"

 _"Hi, Danny, we're just getting up to go hiking this morning. How are you?"_ Sam's voice chirped.

"I'm fine, but Mayor Tucker needs some help."

 _"Oh?"_

"He's exhausted," Danny explained. "He's been staying up all night reading over papers after he spends all day going to meetings."

"Wha?" Tucker said, lifting his head, "Who are you talking to?"

"Sam," Danny said, turning his head.

"'kay. Tell her it'll be all right. I'll hire Paulina as my secretary," Tucker said, yawning.

 _"I heard that,"_ Sam said. _"You_ can't _hire Paulina, Tucker, she's just going to step on you to get what she wants."_

Danny cringed at the speakerphone Sam had set their call to as it rang in his ear.

 _"Look, I'll ask my dad to find you a secretary. You need someone who knows what she's doing and can help you organize your things as mayor."_

Sam must be pretty determined if she was going to bring her dad into this.

"Still, good looks wouldn't hurt." Tucker added before nodding his eyes shut.

 _"Uh huh."_ Danny could hear Sam rolling her eyes.

* * *

The next day, Tucker groggily pulled himself to the meetings while his new secretary (and lawyer in training), courtesy of Sam, went over the paperwork. He was still too tired to figure out a job for Danny, but the next day all was back to normal and Danny's breakfast was interrupted by the ringing of the telephone.

"Hey, Danny!"

"Tucker!" Danny said, after gulping down some fruit-loops.

"Today, your job will be hanging up the Christmas in May lights! Before you complain, yes, I know you don't like Christmas, but this is a job that you'll definitely do better than anyone else!"

"Thanks," Danny said, after the other two jobs, he needed all the friends in higher places he could get.

Danny's day was going fine, they'd put the lights up in record time, and most importantly – no one was risking life and limb climbing on the sides of buildings to do so. It was a perfect job, that is, until Danny and the light-bulb truck returned back to City Hall.

On the steps was a group of people, holding signs and shouting, and Tucker out of the kindness and naivety of his heart was attempting to answer them.

"THE MAYOR IS CORRUPT!" one of them shouted. "HE'S HIRED THE GHOST BOY, HIS BEST FRIEND!"

"MAYOR MASTERS WOULDN'T HIRE HIS FRIENDS!" yelled the guy holding the sign, "Ghosts go home!"

"Well," Tucker spoke into a microphone. "That's because Vlad didn't have any friends."

"AHA!" yelled another. "YOU'RE BLAMING THE PREVIOUS ADMINISTRATION FOR YOUR PROBLEMS, LIKE THEY ALL DO!"

"Wait, that's not-" Tucker was interrupted.

"WE DON'T WANNA HEAR YOUR LIES!" yelled a woman.

"LIES! LIES! LIES!" the crowd chanted. Danny's face flushed with anger, he felt like turning the ground intangible so these bullies would fall into the sewer pipe he now knew was under City Hall, but that wouldn't solve anything.

Instead he turned invisible and flew over to Tucker.

"Don't listen to them," Danny whispered. "Don't let them taunt you like this. Just go inside or they'll make you look bad."

Surprisingly, Tucker took his advice and they went back into the City Hall. He hadn't done anything wrong and he didn't need to "face the music."

* * *

But the next day, the protestors were still there, Tucker's first order of the day was to meet with the City Council, so he straightened his tie, walked into the room, and sat at the head of the table. The people were already muttering.

"I'm just glad they're protesting this and not the city declaring that Christmas should come twice a year."

"Yes, it'd be a shame if we lost our regular Christmas break as well as this new one over government and religion debates."

"And I was planning on going skiing."

"Ahem," Mayor Tucker said. "The City Council meeting for May 20th is now in session. McKenzie, would you record the minutes."

"Yes, sir."

"Now," began the treasurer. "I am afraid we have to address the problem of the protestors outside our doors. Because of them, the media has been rather inquisitive concerning our hiring practices."

"Mr. Mayor," the County Commissioner added with a loftier tone. "We know you are new in this role, but accusations that have occurred are serious, they are accusing you of illegal hiring practices, not only because you've hired a friend, but also because you hired him based on physical attributes."

"What do you mean?" Tucker asked.

"You chose Phantom for these jobs because he can fly and turn things intangible. This implies, that you discriminated against other regular _human_ candidates," the Commissioner stated, looking down his nose.

Tucker didn't like the way the Commissioner said human with a loftier tone.

"I wasn't discriminating, I was saving the city money by hiring the most qualified man – er, ghost – for the job," Tucker said.

"Be that as it may," said the Treasurer, "On the employment forms you specifically hired Danny _Phantom,_ not _Fenton_. Since Phantom is a ghost, he is not legally allowed to work in the United States."

"But he's one in the same," Tucker said.

"And another thing," the Commissioner said. "The newly-formed Citizens Against Spectral Preference in Employment Relations – C.A.S.P.E.R. – has been outside the Sherriff's office, asking for them to arrest Phantom on charges of bribery."

"Bribery?" Tucker asked, stunned.

"Yes," the Commissioner continued. "Bribery. As a ghost, the Phantom could haunt you if you do not do what he wanted."

"But…" Tucker shook his head. "He didn't do that… And," Tucker said, finding his courage. "Anyone, any _human_ could threaten me if I didn't hire them, either, except that hasn't happened. No one's threatened me. Although, I do find there a quite a few people who are so jealous they'd rather tear a good worker down than build themselves up."

"Well said, Mr. Mayor," McKenzie added.

"Now, if you'd excuse me, I'm going home to be ready for the presents Santa's bringing me in the morning." Tucker said.

"Wait!" The Commissioner said, "You still believe in Santa Claus! You _are_ naive!"

"This meeting is adjourned." Tucker smiled, then thought to himself. _I just can't wait for Halloween._


End file.
